All that separates the Russos' film from its predecessors is that it's a lot more stupid. After many happy years as a CIA hitman under the command of his beloved boss and father figure Fitzroy (Billy Bob Thornton with a Colonel Sanders beard), Six gets hold of a USB stick containing some incriminating data about Fitroy's smug young replacement Carmichael (Regé-Jean Page). Yes, a USB stick. Not exactly cutting edge, is it? The one-dimensionally evil Carmichael calls in a one-dimensionally crazy contractor called Lloyd (Chris Evans with a moustache) to retrieve the doohickey and to bump off Six, and Lloyd in turn calls in every team of assassins in his little black book. Yes, he has unlimited funds. And yes, the assassins have the magical power to converge on Six, wherever he is in the world. And yes, they're all able to take truckloads of heavy artillery through customs. And yes, these supposedly covert organisations and elite hit squads can fire rockets at each other in city squares without anyone asking any awkward questions.
